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Maybe the entire “thing” here is shaping poems to recover the language I was trying to write but was too repulsed from: any such absence from drafts is a non-enactment (a failure for a poem to be about its own poetic except grotesquely) of the meaning of poetry (the inability of a poem to name itself as a poem). That sounds a bit overblown though, and explaining why I think that may involve some post modern graphs eh.